Date:	2004-08-04 10:40
Subject:	FUCKING ISAAC
Security:	Public
Mood:	lonely
Music:	memory -- SUGARCULT

holy shit - am i in like the biggest dilemma of my life or what?? i am so totally screwed its not even funny anymore... fuckin isaac. oh dear god. i thought it was all under control - then sunday came along. fuckin sunday. we went to laser force... and i had to have one of the best times ever didnt i... and it wasnt just isaac who made me happy to be there - philaman, manuel, kelman, kate and wil did too... but fuckin isaac. shit. thats all i can say. my mind is screwed over big time because of him. but of course the day didnt end there - i had to work with him that night.... and it only got better and better didnt. oh - except for the fact that stupid-loser josh came in. grr... anyway besides the psycho i chucked over that for 5 minutes (yet again i ask myself - wtf jesse - ur so dumb! why does it still make u mad? maybe it has something to do with him bringing that girl in every fucking time. stupid fucker)... ha - guess what the work of the day is???
anyway this screwed up isaac situation... yes it got quite bad on sunday. he even gave me a hug for the sake of giving me a hug - and ever since then i cant get him out of my mind. like before , i would think of him often - but now it seems like every single thing i am doing or thinking gets somehow related back to him. it is driving me up the fuckin wall goddammit. sooo... yesterday i had to go to kfc to drop something off for kadie. i knew he was gonna be working at 6... so i stuck around for like 30-40min to see him. i was gonna say something, but i couldnt... not there - not where things could be interrupted. or maybe i just couldnt. yes - probably i couldnt. argh - i am so wishing i did now... cos last night - i got so shitted off at myself that i didnt say anything so i sent him a msg.... it went something like this: oh isaac... wat am i to do with u! u have been driving me up the wall for the last few days. i cant stop thinkin bout u and im goin insane! and i only hung around tonight to c u! i was gonna say something 2 u 2nite, but yeah... i didnt. i dunno. this will be really weird 4u. sorry.
hmmm so that was that... and i havent heard anything back. i should never have done it like that ... but, argh what can u do. oh well

Date:	2004-07-28 19:03
Subject:	lekkerdings EVERYWHERE
Security:	Public
Mood:	bouncy
Music:	everywhere (cover) -- YELLOWCARD.. i can so relate...

wat is it with the last three days - lekkerdings EVERYWHERE... very great. thank you god... thank you. :) hahahaha ahhh dear
im at uni - hanging around for jess to finish her lecture so i can catch the train home with her... i just ate a giant cookie... mmmm giant cookie goodness.
had a crazy day today... had to leave at 6 cos i had an 8am lecture... god they are great. except i almost fell asleep i was so bored... then i had a 7.... or zeven! hour break - holy shit balls!!! it wasnt too bad. i met erin and ali for lunch... and i ran into darz... and he gave me free cds....go man go! and then i had my prac 5-8. it turns out my lab partner (who i only met today) has a niece and nephew who went to st. columbans that are in gr12 and 10... how freaky. how totally bizarre.
i have had a really awesome few days come to think of it actually. they have just been good... i was walking back to the station yesterday and i was smiling for no apparent reasons as i walked along. it was good! its gonna be so fun this semester - cos me and philas uni times match up heaps so i catch the train with her every morning and 3 afternoons a week. woo hoo! and i see ali heaps cos she comes to GP twice a week for french so thats awesome, plus she is on our thursday morning train! and ive run into heaps of people i know - erin, darz, kathryn, plus people i actually know from uni. im not that fussed on a few of my subjects - ie. molecular biol and metabolism. but micro and physiol are pretty cool!! but i have shit loads of work to do already!!! ARGH! maybe i should do some now.
i am going to laser force on sunday... woo hoo!! kel msged me about it - and shes like whos team she wants to be... im like PICK ME PICK ME (damn philamans influence... hehehe)... and she's like: i thought i would be left out of ur group.... and im like : what the fuck? ur in my top 3 kelman - u phila and isaac!! woohhoo... yep - still going on that freakin isaac thing... damn stupid mind jesse. AH!

Date:	2004-07-26 09:36
Subject:	ok never press enter after writing the subject
Security:	Public
Mood:	busy
Music:	everywhere (cover) -- YELLOWCARD

argh! that was scary... anyway yes - week 2 already ... oh the craziness... if only my holidays would last forever.... if only.
but anyway - at least im studying... well... im not actually. distracted by doing this.... but oh well. i have about 45 min till philaman gets here so i will do more before she comes. ahh... now i feel guilty. i better get back to it

well

Date:	2004-07-21 22:28
Subject:	i just dont know anymore....
Security:	Public
Mood:	confused
Music:	ocean avenue -- YELLOWCARD

ah what is it with this life i have huh? just when everything seems to be going fine and dandy something has to come along and screw it up for me. or am i just looking for things to occupy my mind for hours on end? do i go out of my way to make things diffucult in my head??
i have had a great holiday (until i had to go back to uni today)... although i didnt feel like i got anything done. i dunno - i promised myself i would catch up with some people... and i did i guess.. like erin and bob, kathryn, fal. but i dunno i guess i feel guilty at not catching up with jess, matthew... people like that who i really wanted to catch up with but just didnt get the chance. its like i have to prioritise my friends and i dont really like that... i mean i really want to see ppl like matt and jess, but why cant i find the time to see them? i mean i manage to see phila, kel, melinda, ali and all them... but i suppose if i dont see them it feels wrong. i need them. i need to see them often. otherwise i just feel empty. its shite. i dunno i feel like im letting people down if i dont see them. and i know like jess doesnt get cut if i dont see her... i mean shes got uni and work and brad and everything else like me, so i guess she understands. but then like matthew - u can tell hes mad at me. and i feel really guilty.
but with phila - im finding i have to see her more and more. i dunno why... i used to think me and phila were pretty different people... like we had a total different outlook on life. but the more i get to know her - the more i realise i am so much like her its uncanny... is that because i am becoming like her... or is she becoming more like me. or are we both just becomign each other. its hard to tell. but im glad i have phila. and its at the stage where i feel totally at home at her house now... like i treat brenton as my brother and pay him out all the time. its great.
then there is melinda... i dont know with her anymore. sometimes everything will be awesome i will want to see her and everything and then sometimes i just ... i dunno. its like i cant trust her. when all that shit happened about a month ago with her... saying i didnt invite her places and stuff... and if i invited phila or ali somewhere, why didnt i invite her... but then she goes and does exactly the same thing. like hangs around with corey and mel and whatever. it doesnt bother me in the slightest that she does it, it just gets me angry when she went crazy at me for doing exactly the same thing. i dunno...
the thing playing on my mind is this thing with isaac... its so stupid its not even funny... and sometimes i think to myself "what is wrong with u jesse"... because there is something fucking wrong with me. 16 years old.... what am 19??? but no matter how many times i tell myself that... it doesnt seem to sink in... sometimes when he does 16 year old things i think... holy shit jesse u total complete fuck head.... and then the other times... i dunno.... is it just one of those things that i will get over in a few months time? or is what i am feeling towards him for real. its starting to really shit me.... and i seem to be spending so much time with him lately. its bizarre. but i dont know.
oh it shits me to tears.
and it didnt just help that i had fallen asleep before and had this horrible dream. all these ppl from work were at my house and we were playing pictionary... we were all in pairs and i was with isaac...anyway everyone was drawing away and guessing and whatever. isaac was drawing and on his piece of paper he just wrote "i hate you jesse. i never want to talk to you again. i love god.".... when i woke up i was crying... they say dreams are just all the thoughts in your head put into pictures and everyday situations... sometimes because you have been thinking about them way too much. i dunno - but the whole thing with god.... it was to do with josh. i hate that. its so freakin long ago - im so over him... im so over all that shit that happened and how screwed up my life got at that stage. it makes me so angry just even thinking about it. isaac doesnt have anything to do with him. so whats with the connection. and why the fuck am i getting so cut over a stupid dream anyway. GRRR!

anyway i came on msn to escape that for at least an hour... ive talked to wil. hes leaving kfc. i liked him.
i talked to paul - normally we just talk about bullshit... work/ uni. never anything exciting... but i dunno - i ended up telling him all about isaac. although i never really told him it was isaac. but he was good - he didnt say "what the fuck jesse, are u crazy?"... it was more supportive... paul is cool. everytime i talk to him, i can see why i used to have a thing for him. it was so weird when i ran into him that day up the coast... i just felt so sick in the stomach at the sight of him... but not bad sick... the kind of sick i used to feel if josh came into kfc... or id see him somewhere by surprise... before we started going out.... but why now that with paul. i dunno - its weird with him. i still think he's hot... cos he is! he should grow his hair again though... and he's really cool. but i dunno- i had sort of convinced myself that it would be shit with him... but i dunno. every once and a while when i do chat to him i cant help thinking about it. that shits me off too.
everything shits me off...
who knows....

Date:	2004-07-07 10:16
Subject:	everyone is back now! DONT EVER LEAVE AGAIN DUDES!
Security:	Public
Mood:	lazy
Music:	catalyst -- NFG

well all my friends are back now! woo hoo!! they better never run off to toowoomba/canberra/tin can bay/ NZ again!!
yesterday i went to the home of steve irwin - AUSTRALIA ZOO. for something that attracts millions of people there every year from all over the world, and that is like half an hour from my house it surprised me that it took me 19 years to see it. how fun was it though!! i went with ali, melinda, lisa and tallulah (shes ali's friend from holland). it was so cool. they had tigers, elephants, koalas, kangaroos, wallabies, snakes, crocs (duh), otters, birds. heapsa fun stuff! and its really hands on too... like i have never touched a koala before! and i did!! woo hoo! kangaroos i have (at dreamworld and stuff)... but yeh u can pat them hear too. and they have build this freakin huge stadium (aka CROCOSEUM) which seats like 5000 ppl. it was crazy. no steve that day though :( but it was heaps of fun...
last night went to the airport with philaman's mum and dad to see phila and brentonian come back from NZ. i love the airport. its so cool!! its one of my favourite places ever. but it would be so much better if i had been going there to get on a plane and not come back from 3 years.... ahhhh.
but anyway phila and brenton got back safe and well. sounds like they had a fun time!!! so i hung around at philas house for awhile - looking at photos and stuff. they are getting their spanish exchange student tomorrow - alvaro.. i think thats how u spell it.. HOW FUN!

Date:	2004-07-05 12:18
Subject:	it feels more like holidays today!
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative
Music:	are you gonna be my girl -- JET

had a very busy few days indeed!!
thursday - ali came over and we watched zoolander. "what is this, a centre for ants??" haha funny stuff. then she cut my hair, i coloured her hair and i coloured kates hair. my god - we should be running our own hair salon i think!! all turned out awesome... and so cheap!

friday - i worked 11-8, and then me, louise and melissa went to see "mean girls"... it was really really good!

saturday - worked 9-5, then i went up to ali's place around 7. we then went too her friend katie's party. it was ok. i didnt know anyone!! but it was cool. then we picked up mate and went to jess halpin's going away party. she's moving to darwin with this guy, daniel. he seems pretty cool. saw lisa :) and some other people from school, some i wanted to see, otherwise i didnt. isaac called me - he was up the coast with jameson getting drunk. but after that got boring me, ali and mate went into the city!! we went to the vic and ran into kathy, stef, emma and some other friends of philas. then we went into the vic and ran into kaela. she didnt say much to me and ali, only talked to kathryn. surprise surprise. man i sounded like a bitch then... oh well. then we moved between karaoke, the beer garden and upstairs. watched kaela sing the 'love shack'... that was funny. then we decided we were hungry (us? never!)... so we went to the 7-11 and ate donuts and M&Ms... then we ran into kathy/stef again... then these two irish dudes came up to us and started talking to us. we all thought they were pretending to be irish... but they were stil pretty nice... so then we followed them back to the vic where they pulled out freakin irish passports to get in. woops... then we just went upstairs and danced for awhile. got sick of that. so then went home but stopped into maccas on the way home. got tenderheart care bear. woohoo! got home about 4.30.

sunday - worked 11-8. i was tired all day and the day just dragged. i musta looked like i was in a shitty mood cos kel and kate kept telling me i was. but i wasnt. i just wanted to go home and sleep. by the end of the night i was shitty though. josh the fucker came in, i dont get why i get angry over that still... it makes me mad that i am mad at that. then mel came in and told me that fal had started going out with this guy. what the fuck. how come i didnt know??? and what about glen. i spose he has apparently moved on already as well. what the fuck. three years... and then they can turn around without a thought... i dont get it. oh well - not my problem i guess. mum and dad were back from their holidays when i got home, good to see them again.

i have today off :) which is fantastic!!! probably try and catch up with melinda tonight cos she is back from camp, and coresta msged me, sounds like he wants to do something so i guess we might do something. that sentence was strange. oh well.
tomorrow im going to australia zoo!!! and philaman comes home! she said she saw snow. how cool!

Date:	2004-07-01 10:49
Subject:	supertroopers!
Security:	Public
Mood:	pleased
Music:	MEMORY (sugarcult)

well yesterday morning i worked 8-11, actually turned out to be 8-12! coresta showed  me how to cook :) it was fun!

then last night mel, kat, louise, isaac, coresta and jameson came over and we watched movies. we saw freddy got fingered (so funny, yet so freakin weird), 28 days later (it sucked, we didnt even finish watching it) and SUPERTROOPERS!!!! yay!! evil shenanigans!!! lol i loved it.

me, isaac and kat didnt go to bed til after 3.oo so now i am really tired.

kate dyed my hair yesterday - red and black. woo hoo! i think ali is going to cut it for me today!

i have the day off... but a few busy days coming up...

friday  working 11-8, then going out tomorrow night

saturday working 9-5, then going out witih aliman

then sunday working 12-9!

crazy!!

woo hoo! im on holidays!! YAY!!!!!! HOW FUN!!!
had my last two exams yesterday... they were ok... one good, one bad...
then last night ali, mate, and manuel came over and we watched shrek 2 and cat in a hat. they were cool!!!
today i cleaned my room.
i have to go to work - im on the close - me, kate and isaac!! :)

well all my hopes of doin an alnighter so icould actually do well today in my exam have gotten screwed up. yes i have managed to stay up, but i havent done a freakin thing. i looked over one lecture... out of 39! i hate how i have done nothing for this. i deserve to fail. i hate it! im tired now.... dammit! in 12 hours i will be free. i wanna do something to celebrate - it will be such a relief!!!

i am still procrasinating... even though i am staying up all night to "study"... god i am stupid

in 6 hours i have to be on the train going to do two freakin exams i dont have a freakin clue about! im gonna do an all nighter ive decided - i have to other choice.
didnt get hardly anything done yesterday... grr. went out last night with ali and melinda to see ali's dads play. it was so awesome. tim was in it!!! hehehe - he was cool. there was the WEIRDEST play about this guy who turned into a chicken... it was friggin weird.
then i came home and kelman was here.
this morning me and her made patty cakes... they were yum. i feel one like now. then i went to work... nothing exciting. issac was on.. :)
i have to study. ARGH!

well i worked it out. i have about 10 hours to study 13 weeks work off stuff for two subjects. !@#*(#@*(&$*@#&$)(!@$# you could say i am pretty screwed. yet i will still make time to procrastinate and write in this!! hehe
last night was the close - eh - it was ok. i could kick craig though - he is so rude.
then it was the corester's party IV. what an eventful night.
me, kelman and shauna rocked up at quarter to 12.... and it all begun. it was the weirdest thing ever. got out of the car and louise is sitting on her car by herself... im like louise man are u ok? "yeh im ok".... what are you doing louise? "just hanging".... ok.... walk in to the room and melinda and emma come through the other door bawling their eyes out. wtf? corester is yelling out "james is passed out!"... then 2 minutes later "james is throwing up"... isaac is like "hello my wife... how are you..." like 50 times... melissa is just saying random things... walking off... then coming back.... josh is telling these random stories that are so stupid... shandel who i thought was ok, wasnt - she started talking some utter crap... im like WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!!!!! it was crazy... then phila is like "im going ..."... no!! she seemed like the only sane one there... but she gets to go to NZ! she will be on the plane right now!!! it was the strangest night ever i swear to god...
better study!

well yesterday i was supposed to work 12-9. i work up after the night before (oh really jesse - who woulda guessed, what a stupid thing to say....)... and felt pretty ok. i got up and did some stuff and then around 10.00 started feeling sick again... i went to work anyway... by the time i got there i felt worse... and according to corey looked like shit... but after awhile packing i guess my mind was off feeling sick and i felt a bit better. things then took a turn for the worse and i felt really light headed and naseous. i couldnt stand up anymore, even sitting down wasnt enough. so i lay down the back on the cold floor... i went and lay in my car for awhile - i didnt want to drive home cos i felt like i was gonna black out or something. so i lay there for awhile until i felt a bit better than i drove home. i got home and dad was home... i was like what the??? turned out he was sick too!! so then i slept all afternoon... and watched tv that night. watched the jet dvd i got with my cd and also punkorama dvd... which had some video clips on it. then i went to sleep. so tired. now i actually have to do some study today. working the close then i have corester's party.
i have to get these cell and molecular workshops done!!! YIKES!!

Well biochem went fairly well... i got my prac book back and got 85% on it.. how crazy!! i was really surprised at that seeing as it was full of absolute shit!! but anyway i sat down on tuesday and figured out i need 8% more to get me to 50% ( a pass).... woohoo!! so yeh by answering a couple of multi choice questions right i was there!! lucky that i wasnt relying on that exam... cos i couldnt even do the short answer. it sucked.
didnt get home til 9 that night - i was so exhausted... but i stayed up to watch rovey!! it was funny. i hadnt seen it for ages!
wednesday morning i had to work at 8!! doing the mats again.... its good to have something different to do!! corey, mel and sam were on so it was pretty good... so i worked out the back til 12, then packed until 2. Louise was telling me her dogs had puppies!! how cool... im gonna go around and see them next week sometime hopefully!!
then i went to philamans house! there house had like changed over night! their fireplace was in and they got a new tv cabinet and they were getting a table as well! a WOODEN one... cool man! so then we drove to chermside.. we were going to GOLD CLASS to see SHREK! it was so fun. we bought heaps of food - popcorn, frozen coke, M&Ms, maltesers!!! and the cinema was so nice!! the chairs were so comfy!! and the movie was soooo funny! it was awesome!!
so after that we were supposed to be seeing gyroscope play in at the zoo... well we didnt know what time it was on, or even where the zoo was for that matter... hehehe... so phila rang up and got the address - ann st. it was off to a good start. so then she rang the place and found out they werent playing until 11!! what the.... who plays at 11.00 on a wednesday night. gyroscope obviously do. so we drove around for awhile. we found out where the zoo was. then we drove over the story bridge, then back over the story bridge. woo hoo! anyway we parked above brunswick station. so we thought we would go inside and just sit around. it was only 7.00!! i started feeling really sick and nauseous. i think i had eaten to much. i felt realy gross. so we went back to the car... and i lay down in the back seat and phila went through her spanish book! so i felt a bit better by about 10... so we wandered over to the zoo. OMIGOD - it was the coolest place. it looked real dodgy from the outside, but upstairs it was awesome. everything had been painted cool - and it was just... cool! there were heaps of ppl there too which surprised me!! anyway - we saw gyroscope. they were really good. i remembered they were good last time i saw them with the living end but i couldnt remember a thing about them. phila has burnt their cds for me, but i stil havent had a chance to listen to them! but yeh, they seemed really happy with the crowd, like not just fake happy like someband are"oh you are guys are awesome"..."oh your the best crowd ever"... nothing like that. u could see they were completely genuine which was nice.
i have a crazy few days coming up... and all i wanna do is sleep.
today - work 12-9
friday - seeing the second supertrooper movie, work the close, coreys party
saturday - study?? go see ali's dad's play
sunday - work 12-9
monday - do two exams... and the only time to study for these is a few hours on saturday... i havent done anywork for them!! ARGH!
tuesday - SLEEP!!!!! WOO HOOO!!!!!

well well - i have been extra busy over the last few days.
lets start with saturday!! OMIGOD -- THE OFFSPRING WERE SO COOL!!!! me, philaman, kelman, katman, melissa and jameson all caught the train in. i was really excited!! cos i got to see something corporate as well. they were sooooooooo cool. they did awesome. except for when the dude stood on the keys of the piano!! :O! didnt like that... but at least he had nice hair!! :) then bodyjar played... ive seen them before! philaman has seen them 4 times now :O. then the offspring came on. OMIGOD. it was so fantastically unbelievably awesome. they were soooo awesome live i could not believe it. it was awesome. poor kat was really sick for the whole night. poor thing!
then sunday came arounnd. i had to work 12-9... but then i got called in to start @ 11. cos kat and jameson had both called in sick. but it was ok cos kel had stayed at my house and she was starting at 11 as well so she drove me. it was a really really bad day at work. started off fine. i had to help adrian down the back for the first hour cos there had only been one cook all morning. so i did some wash up and some racking and that was all good. then i went back out on burgers. holy shit. we were so busy.... it was nuts. natasha gave me the shits big time. i had heaps of burgers and admitedly i was running heaps behind. anyway she decides her burgers are more important than anyone else's and comes out the back to make hers. now we were running out of mayo. i was on the last pack we had in the store, and craig was off at another store getting some more. i told natasha that cos she was having trouble getting the mayo out... so she keeps squirting and used about 10 times the amount of mayo she had to... grrr... and i cant make my burgers cos she was in the way getting bacon and lettuce and stuff like that. so i just stepped back and felt really really angry. finally she had gone. so i went back to making my burgers. then i find out she has taken all the bacon!! ARGH! then a few minutes later emma comes round and says the 2 bacon and cheese burgers i just gave her were cold (the lady had brought them back)... shes like "just microwave them".... and im like "nah its cool i'll make you up another two..."... so i did. i made sure i microwaved new bacon for her, and microwaved the buns in their packet as well. so the burgers were extra hot.... anyway emma comes back about 5 minutes later crying... the stupid customer, stupid hoe, had started yelling at emma saying that these were too cold because all i did was put them in the microwave. poor emma - she was so upset. meanwhile the stupid bitch-hoe of a customer is yelling at carly who is on drive thru (who is trying to take orders and money at the same time) saying that she wants to see the manager... so tiff goes out and cops a mouthful as well. ohhh it was so crazy. i got really really mad and starting throwing things and all this shit. it was really scary cos i never get mad. kelman could see i was getting angry so then wen it finally died down she told me to go have a break. so i walked down the back, turned off the light and burst into tears. i felt so horrible. kel came down to give me a hug. then i felt a bit better. it was awful. the rest of the afternoon wasnt too bad... i didn't get my half until 4.45.... then emma was doing preps had to go after me. so she went at 5.15. but she hadnt finished preps cos she didnt get them started until really late... so i kept doing preps until like 6.30. it was crazy!!
isaac and kelman cheered me up and the rest of the night was really good. there was isaac, willie and josh all on as the cooks and i was on wash up so that was awesome!!! then me, kel and em were all finishing at 9... em had to wait around til 10 for kadie to finish and me and kel had to wait until 9.30 for isaac to finish (cos kelman was takin me and isaac home)... so me, kel and em went to maccas and got sundaes (and i got more cheeseburgers). we met a friends of marie's who works there... she is exactly like marie. it was funny. then we went back to kfc and we were playin sum41 and kel was driving round and round drive thru beeping her horn. so then we swapped em for isaac and drove home!! it was fun.
that nite i msged isaac and kelman, thanking them for making me be happy again. isaac wrote back "anything for you jesse cos you are my best friend". i started crying again...
then on monday (yesterday) i was supposed to study for biochem... i did a bit... not even an hours worth and stuffed around for the rest of the day.
so now i am at uni... i am supposed to be meeting up with dianna, rach and kim upstairs so i really should get a move on. i have to do 10 weeks of lectures in about 7 hours. SHIT!!! BETTER GET GOING!!!

well yesterday was a major bumming around day. i couldnt even study for more than half and hour. i am so freakin slack. will definitely have to do more today thats for sure!! i am so screwed for biochem!! EEK!
the most important happening of the day was indeed 28 days/ one dollar short / after the fall playing at the waterloo.
it was only supposed to be me, philaman, coresta, aliman and melissa going but melinda was added at the last minute and then we decided to drive in. it turned out good cos we parked right across the road from the place for FREE ( i love free stuff!!).
after the fall were AWESOME!! they are really really good and i think they are gonna make it big pretty soon. i loved their set - and i bought a Tshirt!!!
i have never heard any of one dollar shorts stuff before... and i was extremely surprised @ how old they were... but then again they have been around for yonks. but they were awesome too!! they really good at getting the crowd going, it woulda been really good to know the words... but it was still cool! i think i will buy their album. i feel bad cos philman brought after the falls album, and their is no point me buyin it cos she will just burn it. so if i buy one dollar short then i can burn it for her!
then 28 days came on... i had already seen them at live and local and was really impressed with them. they played a lot of new stuff which i kinda zoned out in (probably cos i was tired)... but their old stuff was the best...
it was definitely worth every single cent of the $20 (+ booking fee =) ) to see all of these bands. it was an awesome night!!!

BRING ON OFFSPRING / BODYJAR / SoCo TONIGHT!!! WOOHOO!!! i think i am going to go crazy tonight... !!! :) better do some study though!

i dont have to do anything today. no uni AND no work!!! what is the go?? this is awesome. although i should really be studying. i will get to that eventually.
im going to 28 days tonight!! :D its gonna be hell fun. me, phila, ali, mel and coresta are going. after the fall and one dollar short are playing as well. should be great stuff.

yesterday i went into the city to meet up with JESS! who is down from townsville. i went in with laura. i got to meet jess' boyfriend adrian who seems really cool. he works in the army and has been to timor and stuff. so yeh we just hung around the city for awhile.
then i had to dash over to uni to get a few files off the computer...and i was hoping to make the 3.08 but as i came down the escalators it took off. i was really angry. i am never angry at missing trains and buses and stuff like that, cos i know there is always another one and i never understand why people get angry at stuff like that... surely theres other stuff to be angry about.. but i surprised myself that i was angry at that...
anyway i ran into kathryn beazley (she used to go to school with kate way back in primary school) so i had a good talk to her on the next train... and i still made it home for work.
and thats another story... WORK! ahhhh! i was talking to paul the other nite and he reckons i should get a job across the road... i was telling him i could never leave kfc... its too cool. last night - i could have just walked out. it was horrible. natasha was on chips, me on pack and kate on handout... and it was weird cos normally i would have liked that, but neither of them wanted to do anything else other than doing chips or handing out. so when a mega feast got to the window and there was no nuggets in the bag... kate would be like wheres the nuggets jesse... meanwhile i have about 5 orders to pack... why cant she get the nuggets if she is only going to be standing there waiting for me anyway? and natasha just kept packing chips... like even after she had done all the orders... she will just keep on packing chips hoping they will come up and we end up with 10 boxes of chips just thrown all over the bench. oh it was so frustrating. plus we were on the edge of running out of chicken the whole night... we would always just scrape through, but it came oh so very close.
after it slowed down a bit it got a bit better. i had kirstyn, shauna, sarah and wil on the close with me so that was pretty good. adrian and willie were the cooks and they screwed around all night, not surprising though!
my shoulder played up heaps too. it got to one stage in the night were i couldnt even move it - there is something really wrong with it. ishould go get it checked out....
ah i better study!!

no more micro... ha... until next semester. still - it feels good to have one exam done! it was so exhausting. it was the weirdest exam room and the chairs swung all the time and it was fun... too bad i was supposed to be concentrating!
ahhh i hope i passed.
origin II on tonite... hopefully nsw win! woohoo!
tomorrow im going to go see jess - she is down from townsville so that will be good
im so tired....

i am so fuckin angry/sad/depressed at the moment.
ive stayed at philamans the last two days so i could actually get some study done - and i did, and i was surprised how much i actually got done... i am actually going to be confident walking into that exam tomorrow.
everything turned to shit when i got home.
first of all melinda - she gave me a letter to read. pretty much it says that i don't like her anymore, and don't make time for her anymore, and she can't talk to me, and i spend to much time with other people, and that i make her sad.
what the fuck man. i dunno what the hell i did... i didnt do anything intentional thats for sure... i know i have been busy lately and i havent had a chance to see much of her... but thats the same with a lot of other people. ive seen fallon like three times since she got back from germany. friendships aren't meant to be hard. its not something you should have to maintain. if i see linzi who i can go for years without seeing her.... we are the best of friends when we see each other...no maintenance required. im angry that she is blaming this on me. she doesnt seem to wanna listen when i say i didnt mean anything towards her.
so much stuff has been happening... i cant keep up with everything. not only is it exams... which for some crazy reason seems to be the least of my concerns at the moment... i pay thousands of dollars each year and this is at the bottom of my concerns. how does that work? go fuckin figure.
then at dinner tonight... mum, dad and kate were all being stupid and i ended up walking away from the table and went to bed crying. now i am sitting here listening to something corporate... which i really really like. cant wait to see them @ the offspring concert now.
ahhh i dunno - there seems to be so much other shit going on... everything had been going so great. i thought i had overcome all that depression shit. i dont want it to come back. it scared me. i thought i had everything figured out but maybe not.
so much has changed since one year ago when everything went down the shit hole. i cant believe i have come as far as i have. it makes me cry just thinking about what it used to be like. but everything has completely changed since then. im so glad cos i have gotten really close to philaman, aliman and meliman. well i thought i got close to melinda... who really knowns. but those 3 girls have done so much for me and i dont think they even realise... phila and ali dont even know wat i really went through, melinda has an idea but no one really knows the full story...
ahhh i dunno... i just want to get this exam over and done with and the weekend to come. i am so glad phila and i go to concerts all the time cos i love them so much. its like we are in another world. phila is on... gotta go!